Don’t Look Back

With the absence of European football there was hope we might see more Saturday 3pms this year but we appear to have become Monday night mainstays instead. Not great for anyone travelling long distances, not great for fanzine sales and especially not great for those of us whose ideal match day is typically bookended by 5-6 hours ‘socialising’. I’ve not added it up but compared to last season’s total outlay I must’ve saved an absolute fortune in total.

Thanks to Michael Carrick and the general ineptitude of rival teams, at the time of writing it looks like CL qualification will be secured with games to spare. We’ve only played once over the last month and yet we’re still in 3rd place somehow – it’ll take an almighty capitulation for us to balls it up now. It’s been quite the turnaround from 12 months ago where despite lurching all the way to Bilbao, a 15th place finish was exactly what we deserved after an appallingly poor PL campaign.

This season has been much improved, particularly in the period immediately after Carrick’s appointment where Mainoo returned to the starting line-up and the whole team started to play like the shackles were off. We’re still quite brittle, particularly at OT (as Leeds recently demonstrated) but the positive signs are starting to outweigh the negatives (he said tentatively). The game at Stamford Bridge serves as a good example of this as there’s no way we would have seen that out so comfortably under Amorim.

Our inconsistency at home is made plain if you consider the experience of my mate’s 14 year old daughter. She’s been coming to the game with us over the last 3-4 years whenever there’s a spare ticket. Last season we noticed a trend had developed and after some discussion and questioning, it came to light that in 25+ visits to OT she’s seen United win a grand total of ONCE. It’s an incredible stat which has now led to her being known as ‘the curse’. If this poor girl had been born 2 decades previously she’d more than likely have never seen us get beat.

I was one of those people banging on about the missed opportunity for an unlikely title charge bearing in mind the horrendous run of dropped points over Christmas. A mate then helpfully pointed out that if we’d won those games (Everton, West Ham, Bournemouth & Wolves) then the likelihood is Amorim would never have been sacked in the first place. Instead of anticipating the return of CL football, we’d still be stuck in mid-table and Kobbie Mainoo would be about to leave for Napoli or wherever.

As usual, the upcoming summer transfer window is going to be key as regards how we progress from here. Prior to that, you’d hope they’ll make a decision within the next couple of weeks on Michael Carrick’s immediate future. All things considered, I wouldn’t have any issue with him getting the gig full-time as I think he’s done pretty well. Judging by the body language, the players appear to be fully on-board and results have been decent overall. If he finishes top four and doesn’t get the job then he’ll have every right to feel a bit aggrieved.

The main priority in the summer has to be replacing Casemiro with someone of a similar calibre, yet minus the ageing legs. Casemiro has been very good this last few months playing in tandem with Kobbie. He’s a top professional and will be remembered fondly for his efforts during what’s been a turbulent 4 year stay at the club. Clearly, he’s benefited from the less-congested fixture calendar this season as there’s no way he can handle playing twice a week at this stage of his career.

Casimero’s imminent departure wouldn’t seem so dramatic if we had someone capable of filling his boots, but Ugarte has been mostly terrible when called upon and will likely follow him out of the door. That leaves Bruno, Kobbie, the perma-injured Mount and a bunch of kids with a handful of first team appearances between them. Amorim explained last summer that we could manage with a depleted squad due to not playing in Europe but that won’t be the case next season.

Aside from that, the priority is probably a right back but given budgetary constraints I’d be content with a couple of new midfielders. 12 months ago I’d have been happy to cash in on Bruno but he’s responded with his best season since he was at the peak of his powers during Covid. He’s possibly in with a shout of winning the PFA award as I don’t really see many other standout candidates. City will probably end up edging out Arsenal to win the league but both teams are nowhere near the level they were a couple of years ago.

This summer will thankfully see us rid of Jadon Sancho, an absolute disaster of a signing whose career continues its steady decline. Neither Villa nor Chelsea wanted him on a permanent deal so he’ll likely opt for another shot at Dortmund – the only place on earth where he seems capable of getting his act together. There are numerous cases of modern pros thinking they’ve made it at 21 with nothing left to prove, post-Fergie MUFC have certainly been good at cultivating them.

Another one too thick to understand how lucky he actually was, is our friend Alejandro Garnacho. This brainiac has gone from an out-of-sorts, inconsistent mess at United to an out-of-sorts, inconsistent mess at Chelsea where everyone hates him. Those “we’ll have him for 3-4 years then he’ll go to Madrid” predictions seem a very long time ago now. All because he got dropped to the bench for the Europa final and responded with a complete hissy fit. He’ll get forced out there, do 2 years at Villarreal and then head ‘home’ to South America. In other words, the Anthony Martial career trajectory.

Talking of inconsistency, I’m not in the least bit surprised to learn that Marcus Rashford’s ‘dream move’ to Barca might be coming to swift conclusion. Due to a supportive fanbase and an effective PR team, he was given an easy ride here despite years of erratic performances. Instead of accepting some criticism as merely part of the job, the sense of entitlement grew and he’d completely lost the plot by the time he was shipped off to Villa. Keep your fingers crossed the club isn’t considering offering him an olive branch. Enjoy the summer and I’ll see you in August.

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Thieves Like Us

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Confession: up until a couple of years ago, I was broadly in favour of a new ground. I’m not particularly sentimental when it comes to buildings plus I don’t think I’m the only one who feels OT lost its soul when the Stretford End was demolished. So when the question of moving periodically came up I would blithely wave it away and claim I wasn’t really bothered. Admittedly, this could also have been influenced by the fact I didn’t think there was even the remotest chance of it ever happening. The club has been saddled with massive debts for 20 years+ so the prospect always seemed a non-starter.

Other clubs have borrowed heavily to finance new stadiums but United are already mortgaged up to their eyeballs just to try and remain competitive. That’s the net result of 2 decades of Glazer occupation during which time OT has barely changed. In an ideal world we’d have built over the railway line when plans for that were drawn up in the early noughties. They’ve shown no interest in infrastructure investment from the minute they took over. Instead it’s been the odd lick of paint here and there and several failed attempts at fixing the famously leaking roof. Scandalous really, but that’s where we’re at.

It’s now 18 months since there was any news on the proposed new stadium but last week Collette Roche was wheeled out to provide an update of sorts. Although she trilled enthusiastically about making a lot of progress over the last year, as usual there was little substantive detail provided. Apparently the land acquisition is progressing “really, really well” but there was nothing to suggest any movement on the reported deadlock with Freightliner. Given there’s a reputed £350M gap in valuations to overcome, don’t expect this one to be resolved quickly.

There’s still no indication of exactly who’s planning to pay for it either, although the club have now confirmed (as long suspected) that they’re seeking outside investment. The likely source of funding will be from US-based private equity giants, the likes of Blackstone Inc, Ares Management or Apollo Global. Another possibility would be the Carlyle Group, who were reported to be in talks with the Glazers when they were finalising plans to sell part of their stake in the club back in 2023.

Aside from coming clean about financing, there was literally nothing else to report. The rest of the interview saw Roche trotting out the usual platitudes about fan engagement, “we want to build this stadium with them, not for them”, which is quite frankly the biggest load of bollocks I’ve ever heard in my life. Not a single United fan I know wants this move and most people actively despise the idea. As has been clear from the start of this process, the club had a preordained idea what they wanted and any efforts to consult with fans on the subject are merely performative

At the first round of Town Hall Meetings at OT in 2024 we were told that this was just the first step and there would be plenty more opportunities to engage. In the subsequent 18 months there’s been a single survey sent out gauging reaction to various ticketing options (rest assured, this proposed debenture scheme will definitely happen)… and that’s it. Apparently there were some smaller focus groups held last year (including season ticket holders and members) but I’ve no idea how they were selected – I attended the first meeting and haven’t heard anything since.

Whilst I’m sure the club are determined to retain outright ownership of the new stadium, the fact the entire project is reliant on outside investment raises the distinct possibility that this might not be the case. Further debt financing is neither desirable nor affordable so I expect an entirely new structure could be the most likely outcome. MUFC would become a separate entity with a joint venture company or special purpose vehicle (SPV) forming to encompass everything related to the new stadium.

Although there’s no official confirmation that MUFC won’t be the primary owners, given that existing debts are at such a high level, it’s hard to see how they’ll secure funding without setting up a “stadium company” model. This kind of lease-back arrangement with shared ownership would be infinitely more attractive to any potential investor. It would result in MUFC technically paying rent to the stadium company who would then use that revenue to pay down the loans taken out that funded the building costs.

The optics around this are pretty terrible of course, but INEOS are well-versed in spin and they’ll be plenty of client journalists on-hand to pretend this is all very wholesome and above board. Call me a dinosaur if you like but I’m still fuming that we’re being led down this path to start with. I’m absolutely convinced that the club’s claim of 52% of ST Holders and members being in favour of moving was inaccurate. Whilst we’re on that subject, why were members consulted at all? I’m not interested in what Rory from Hemel Hempstead who goes once a season thinks

I strongly suspect the main driver behind all this, ultimately, is the desire for one final gargantuan payday prior to the Glazers selling up. By borrowing heavily to fund a new stadium they’ll essentially be repeating what they did in 2005 – using someone else’s money to buy something they can’t afford and saddling the club (or “stadium company” in this case) with another couple of billion pounds of debt. Once the project is greenlit, both the club and the surrounding land will appreciate in value and revenue projections will increase. At that point the share price will rise sharply and they’ll be free to ride off into the sunset.

Every club who moves starts off thinking their new home is brilliant before the initial excitement subsides and they start lamenting what they’ve lost. West Ham and Spurs went through it and Everton are currently in the process of realising life at the Hill-Dickinson isn’t all that. I’ve been to both the Met-Life and the SoFi in the USA and although visually impressive, they’re essentially gigantic, corporate megadomes. I’m calling it now, the novelty of selling off our history for chicken tenders, cup holders and £1500 season tickets will wear off in a matter of weeks.

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Don’t Stop

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Well that was pretty good, wasn’t it? I don’t think even the most ardent optimist could have predicted that set of results during Michael Carrick’s first month in charge. I mean, we could all see that Amorim’s favoured 5-3-2 wasn’t exactly working but I didn’t quite grasp the extent to which it was actively holding us back. I know it’s early days and I’m not getting carried away yadda yadda but basically everything is sorted now. Even if we don’t win the league this year we’re definitely winning it next season.

Obviously I’m not being entirely serious here but credit where credit’s due, given the absolute dross served up in recent times it’s been quite the turnaround. We’ve played some lovely stuff over the last few games featuring some scarcely believable passages of play from the same group of players who’ve been unable to string 3 passes together for much of the last 18 months. Whereas previously they looked tentative and passive, they now appear hungry and confident. This is more like it, lads.

There’s been a few parallels drawn with the similarly feelgood start to Solskjaer’s time in charge during the winter of 2018/19. United won 8 on the bounce and 14 of his first 19 games in charge prompting Woodward to hand him a 3 year contract. Form then nosedived completely and we won 2 of the next 10, missing out on a CL spot that should have been achieved comfortably. Needless to say, it is vital that the club avoids making a similar judgement on Carrick now. Yes, it’s all very encouraging but let’s see how the season plays out before making any kind of decision.

That’s not to say I wouldn’t want to see him given the job full-time. If this kind of form continues for the remainder of the season he’ll rightly be seen as a very strong candidate. Out of all the names mentioned there’s only Ancelotti who I’d feel confident in and he’s already kiboshed the idea saying he’d only consider Real Madrid after his stint in Brazil comes to an end. If the other contenders are limited to the bloke from Crystal Palace and the bloke just sacked by Spurs then I expect Carrick has a great chance irrespective of what happens from now until May.

Football punditry continues to get worse year by year, mainly due to the need to fill hour after hour of non-stop coverage on multiple platforms. I thought we’d reached saturation point when Sky Sports News became a thing, but it’s even worse now due to the fan cam crowd and already over-exposed faces like Neville and Keane now having their own YouTube channel or whatever it is. I don’t actively seek out any of this content but it’s still everywhere because even if you don’t watch it you’re force-fed clips on social media or their latest nonsense makes the next day’s headlines. It’s exhausting.

Arsenal are currently getting it from all angles just because the media decided to crown them PL champions back in October. This wasn’t based on anything other than City had a bad start and Liverpool’s form dropped off a cliff. Now to clarify, I don’t like Arsenal but compared to City and Liverpool I really don’t mind them that much. I don’t like their manager, their knobhead internet fans (same as every other club) and I don’t like them fouling goalkeepers at corners. I do find the reaction to their current sticky patch to be pretty pathetic, however.

The PL is a genuine test of endurance and given the level of competition, winning it is incredibly difficult. Truth be told, Arsenal don’t look anything like the team they were a couple of years ago. Literally everyone in my circle has agreed for months that they still expect City to win it – it didn’t take a genius to predict they would improve after Christmas and Arsenal’s nerves would kick in as the run-in approached. Nevertheless, the media consensus was that it was basically a one-horse race and they were going to walk it.

So now there’s a tedious pile-on since the cracks are starting to show and their lead has been reduced to 2 points. You expect this level of discourse from Goldbridge-level bantz merchants but now it’s all over the mainstream media too. I’m honestly sick of it and it genuinely impedes on my enjoyment of the sport. I get more nuance and perspective talking to mates in the pub than I do from any talking head on Sky Sports filling another 30 mins of mind-numbingly banal content. I’ve honestly reached the stage where I don’t wish to hear Gary Neville utter a single word on any subject for the rest of my life.

Another one who needs to stop talking is Jim Ratcliffe, who continues to show he’s a genuinely terrible person each time he opens his mouth. It’s not exactly a shock to learn that a 73 year old billionaire holds some Enoch Powell-esque political opinions, but most of those operating in the public eye at least have the good grace to keep them under wraps. Monaco-dwelling Jim is proving himself a massive hypocrite and is in a major strop because his business is struggling and UK industry isn’t thriving post-Brexit as he predicted.

Ratcliffe may well have valid grievances with the government about Net Zero and its effect on the chemicals sector, but using talk of colonialism as a stick to strike back at them is incredibly snide and disingenuous. The Britain First march in Manchester last weekend serves as a reminder how the far right are quick to capitalise whenever the subject of immigration hits the headlines. Whether that was his intention or not, public figures like Ratcliffe espousing broadly similar views plays directly into their hands and provides further oxygen for their narrative.

If any other club representative had expressed similar sentiments it would likely have resulted in a reprimand and disciplinary action given the current climate of football club’s promoting diversity and inclusivity at every opportunity. It’s easy to scoff at ‘wokeist’ initiatives and how they’ve become almost obligatory for pretty much every organisation existing in modern Britain. Ratcliffe’s comments give a clue as to precisely why they’re necessary.

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